Baby Steps

Hi guys.

So, today I kicked ass. Let me expand on that... instead of spending 30 minutes on the elliptical and 20 on the treadmill (and then 10 with weights) I went 10 minutes on one type of elliptical, 30 minutes on another type of elliptical, and then 10 minutes on the first type of elliptical machine. Then, I lifted weights. So, I spent 50 minutes on two different types of elliptical trainers, then did my weights. HECK YES. I slowed down for the 30 minute machine, but still. I think I burned over 400 calories. I want to do this all week, and then somehow switch it up next week.

I am really pumped about this, and proud of myself. :)


If I don't lose weight this week I will punch something. No, I won't, but I will be pissed.

<3 times a million,

M

After thanksgiving..

So today was weigh day and I'm not going to lie I was definitely nervous. I indulged last week. And as last week was the third straight week with no weight loss and it was Thanksgiving I was not expecting much. I had braced myself for weight gain, although I really didn't think I had an extra 3500 calories last week, that'd be a lot more than I ate. But I was bracing myself. But the good news is I lost ONE pound. I'm really excited, not only did I break the plateau but it was during thanksgiving week. How in the heck is this even possible?

I did work out just as hard as any other week and I limited what I ate. I tried to let Thanksgiving be a cheat day, but when you look at it there wasn't that much bad stuff. Because my diet has changed SO much from previous times, I actually really enjoyed indulging in things like broccolli casserole and mashed potatoes. Now I know in the area of healthy living these things are full of carbs and they're not good, but comparitively to what I used to indulge in (pizza, wings, cheesefries...) this is SO much better. We're talking about vegetables mixed with low fat milk and some cheese, really, not even compareable to the afforementioned.

SO I'm happy about this for many reasons. I'm happy that I enjoyed myself. And I'm happy my tastes have changed so much that these indulgences are enjoyable to me (I never used to like Thanksgiving food. Many years I would just have a Chilis salad or something instead). I know, weird. But now I'm really enjoying these healthy things because of this lifestyle change.

This week I'm going to do a full week of cardio and work really hard at no exceptions diet wise. I want to limit any extras that aren't going to help me reach my goals for this week espiecally.

I went on the rowing machine for 30 minutes and the stair master for 30 and did 10 minutes on the treadmill. I though it'd be good to mix it up and do machines I never do. I HATE breaking my routine at the gym. Once I get into the swing of something that I like and is working I hate to switch it up. I get so comfortable and I'm afraid I'll undo everything I just accomplished with my old routine. But the fact is if I really want to lose more pounds and not just maintain, I'm going to have to keep switching up. And just as soon as I start to get comfortable I'll need to switch it up again otherwise my body just won't lose the weight.

<3 a

Almost December

So I didn't lose anything this week. :( Poop on a stick. BUT, I did maintain, and that is good. So, I can't complain and wallow in self pity too too much :)

I did my yoga today, and it went well. I am really dedicated to doing it once a week, and I feel like I'm going to get a lot healthier/more flexible/more toned. I'm excited.

I did cheat on Thanksgiving, but have been doing well since. Sometimes you just have to eat like a normal person, and not feel too bad. I'll be on a healthy lifestyle for a long, long time, and it is okay for me to break every once in a while. Also, it was a DELICIOUS dinner cooked by A (best turkey I've ever tasted :)).


So, Im just going to work hard at the gym this week and try to lose more :)

Hope you guys have a good week <3

Hola, Me gusto mucho el stomacho

So, i have had a good little turn around since our subway meeetig.

I have been valiantly trying to work out everyday, as for intense cardio...its just not happening as much as i would like, but i have been doing, swauts, abbs, planks, and yoga like no bodys bussiness... I think a veriation of the aforementioned everyday... And its rediculase beceusae i have cut back on the cheates in my diet but not totally cut everything out. so ill just cut to the chase and then fill in on the details....

I started out at 130 some weeks ago, and now some how im sitting at 124... IM not sure when it came off, but i can see where it left, and this makes me oh so happy!

But i just really suprised! I have cut out most alchol, which is a lot of calories, becuse i normally have a glass of wine everynight with dinner or after. I also have started eating little bits all day long vs. the big meals....And this week i finally let go... Good Bye cheessy gordita crunch... I think that did it. last week i went to the gym and ran, and ran, and ran, and then was so starving i couldent wait thr 45 mon drive home....and ate one...compleately defeated the purpose of the running, but i sippose my heart is healther for it, well minus the artery clogging fat i so rapidlyy injected back into it.

My goal this week is just to keep on track, on friday when we do thanksgivving ( josh is working thurs) idecided to ahve some desert and wine, and forgo large amounts of other things that arnt that great. Goal is to portion control my dinner to 4 oz meat max, and onlly colored veggies free of butter, no bread, and sum stuffing. That wasy i dont have to worry to mucha bout the damage the pie will do...

well i must go start this paper i have been avoiding for a century....


bye!

xxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoo

A little worried about the holidays

Hello loves.

I just wanted to update and tell you guys about this week so far. So far, so good. I'm really sore, and I don't know if it's from yoga, cardio, or what, but WHOA DANG. I huwt :(. Today, especially, was really hard at the gym, I kept wanting to give up, but I kept going. It may be a little creepy but I talked to myself a lot, I say (not out loud) weird things like "C'mon baby, you're doing so well. I'm so proud of you, baby" Why I call myself baby, I have no idea. Maybe it's because that what Joey says to me so I find it comforting? I don't know, but sorta weird.

I'm a little worried about the holidays and all the comfort food they bring. A, I'm really going to be good at Thanksgiving, I'm already committing to this. If I weighed 130 lbs. maybe I would indulge, but that's not where I'm at, so I have to stay true. Hope that is okay :)

Strangely enough, I am SO excited to bake for Thanksgiving. Even though I love sweets and treats, I know I'll be able to abstain, and I'll get joy from making them and making everyone else happy.

Alright, that is all for now. Love you both so mucho.

MTA :)

So excited for thanksgiving, and much needed cheating!

So today I'm doing really well. I had a little breakdown last night about the plateau. But I got over it. Today I went to the gym and worked out really hard. I'm considering next week doing a full week of cardio. Just to switch it up and see what happens.

I'm so excited about thanksgiving. I'm hoping it won't disappoint. But usually my cheating would be on pizza and cheesefries and buffallo wings. but now it's going to be on healthy food! Turkey is actually really good for you and the other things will be vegetables- potatoes, broccoli casserole, squash casserole. The only cheat that'll be really bad is Miss Mary's little devilish cookies. But I'm just so looking forward to it. I know I can treat myself to these things because I've been doing so well.

This is week 8 of our blog and I'm super thankful for it.

a

Official Plateau!

noun: A plateau of a function is a part of its domain where the function has constant value.

This is going to be a very weird, emotional, up and down post, so be prepared. I know it will be because that's how my emotions have been the past few hours. BUT I think the only thing to do is write about it.

So this is week 3 at the exact same weight. Not an ounce either way, for 3 weeks. I only weigh myself of Mondays so my hopes were really up. I got on the scale and was so discouraged. I didn't want to work out, but I took a few minutes and ended up working out. I just feel like, I'm working SO hard and managing my intake of food SO well, what in the world is going on? But after talking to Mary I realize everyone goes through this. It's a part of weightloss. And I could look at this as an end-all be all or a challenge to work through. No one said this was going to be easy.

I just know that my life, my body, strength, energy, self confidence all have increased dramatically since I've made this commitment. And I've tried and tried and tried so many times, you guys know because I spelled it out in one of my first posts. And now would be my pattern to go the other way. Just say fuck it, nothing's changing, why bother? And then I'd get fed up after a few more pounds and come back to trying hard again. I just feel like I can't go down that road again. I've worked so hard to lose the 11lbs thus far and I just don't want to give up.

Even if these last tenlbs take a year, it'd be better to stay steady at this weight andwork on those last ten than go back up and down and up and down. So I'm trying to look at this as a positive. I'm probably not ready to be at maintence. It takes a lot of self control and I know I'm not ready for that yet. I increased my goal for this very reason. I know if I keep working like this it will pay off. It's just frustrating right now.

It's baby steps, and each time I choose the right meal over the wrong one, every time I walk away from the scale and don't give up, every time I look in the mirror and value body, these are all steps in the right direction.

Thanks for all of your help, always.

a

read this por favor!

http://www.bikramyogabrooklyn.com/hurstsogood.pdf

I THINK IT WILL EXSPLAIN BEET THAN I JUST DID IN THAT JUMBLE OF WORDS BELOW.... i FEEL LIKE SUCH A TREE HUGGER : )

im so in love with reading this!

I love that you and Joey are playing Tenis together! And your 25 lbs lite-er, holy crap amazing!!!!
Ash, i am proud beyond words about the chees fries...i know it sounds kinda silly, but its thoos small victories that change and make us into the people we are becomming!


Well for me

This week i have been really good about working out!

sunday i rested from our lil thing and was sore as ever. Monday ran the stairs for 25 minutes. Tuesday rested but did Abbs, yoga... Wed cardio at USF gym and burned 250 cals in 20 min, was very proud considering thats all the time i had. Thurs, Hot Yoga! AMAZING....

It was my best class yet. Not that i preformed that great but it does something to ones spirtit. Barney just has this way of centering you and making one really focus on whats important. He said something that just rang a bell.." In a weeks time we put on pounds of stress, in youga we take off only ounces." Its so true... All week, we go go go, and stress, fight, and bust our ass for what we believe in and are wooking towards. Yet we never take time to build ourselves up and take care of our bodies, which according to many is our temple.

I think it is my new drug of choice.
I find myself rearanging my schedual so i can make time for a minumum of studio time once a week. and now im doing it on off days. But not in a downward dog, plank, repeate way. He swicthces things up everyweek a little bit. And presents them as physicall challenges, and really has this way of teaching one to put the pain and discomfort in this place where it dosne t phase yoiu any more. Sound new age and weird, but im telling you girls you really must go with me to Barneys class some week on Thursday nights... We did this shoulder exercise, and held it and held it and it burned like hell. Bit he was right you get to this thresh hold and its like you mind goes out the window,and you bosy fades away and i was acctually annoyed when he made us stop... Granted my shoulders are still sore and its sunday and this was thursday night. But the mind is such a baffeling, amazing thing. Must go do homework!

love,. Love. Love

Another Five Pounds Lost!

:) :) :)

So that makes the total 25 pounds lost :)

Thank you guys for all the help/support/love/advice.

I love both of you so much.

And I did yoga today. I was right, I did suck, lol. But, I know I'll get better.



This kind of looks like a poem, hahaha.

Anyway, that's all folks.

<3 MTA

Lovely Saturday

Hi!

So yesterday Gordo was sick and we've had plans for this weekend to do some serious car shopping. After the thing with K went off I spend hours this week looking up info on cars, finding them, pricing them etc. I was so excited to go get one this weekend. Well...

It's just so frustraing, buying a used car. Because there's a budget and then there's certain colors you don't like and then the dealer only has one you want with leather and that costs another 1000 out of the budget, blah blah blah.

So we got approved for our loan at a real low rate and we're all ready to go this morning. But Gordo was not feeling real well so we got a late start. Found a good one but the color was ugly. Went to another dealer, the one they had on their website was no longer there. Another dealer had a great car but it was an upgraded edition so they wanted more than we could spend.

The point? Freaking frustrating! So we were worn out and Chili's was across the street and we went. Didn't want to make dinner, easy option. Well, I told him I wanted to get cheese fries. And I was serious. I started justifying it. But THANKFULLY, gordo said let's not get them. I had previously asked him when we started this whole thing to stop me if I really needed help. Most of the times I'm okay at resisting, but today I was just so stressed, it was a coping mechanism. But I had a helper there and I know that had he not been there and I was with someone who didn't care about helping me with this I for sure would have had them. And then 500 calories later I would have been really mad at myself.

And we talked about it later and I told him, I'm not saying I don't want to never have cheese fries again, I just want it to be a planned time. I don't want to do it in the heat of the moment because I'm stressed. And let me tell you, this is the first time I've really been able to be serious about sticking to this. Thanks to you guys, this blog, Gord, and my own hard work I feel like I really overcame something tonight. Yea, I needed that reminder, but I could have gotten them if I really wanted to. But I'm doing SO much better than I ever have and i'm so grateful

<3 A

Tennis, Yoga, Workout

So Joey and I played tennis today, and I kind of stunk. BUT, I had fun and Joey was so cute and patient with me. :) I love him.

Tomorrow I'm getting up and doing yoga. Which, I'm pretty sure I will stink at too, but I will continue doing both until I rock. :)

I've been doing a sort of circuit training, with 10 minutes on the elliptical and 10 on the bike (or treadmill, I switch it up) and I keep switching at 10 minute intervals, ending up with 30 minutes on the elliptical and either 30 or 20 on the treadmill/bike. Nikos said he didn't really think this was not a good idea because I don't keep my heart up at a good rate enough to start burning fat since I sort of go easier on the bike/treadmill than on the elliptical. What do you two think? I feel like I go harder in the 10 minute intervals... I can just see how it goes.

I got these 80 calorie fruit bars... DELICIOUS. But they do have 19 grams of sugar, which isn't awesome, but it says they're made with real fruit. They make good snacks. I also go these 100 calorie ice cream sandwiches. Also very good.


Anyway, that's kind of it for now. I love you guys so much! Thanks for all the support you give me.

MTA

Friday :)

Hey lovely ladies,

So last night I went to see New Moon with my two cousins and my auntie. It was amaaazing. But, seriously, Ash, I can't wait to see it again with you in a quieter theater. My cousin Carly was driving me insane most because she wouldn't stop giving commentary and is ultra Team Jacob (yech!). Anyway, how does this have to do with anything? They had goodies. Mhhhm. Huge buckets of popcorn, cinnabon, and had wanted to order pizza (which thankfully didn't work out). Anyway, I just drank a lot of Diet Coke, hahaha. I wanted the caffeine and figured a boatload of diet coke was better than all the other junk.

Also, I told them all "please don't let me eat any of this" from the beginning, so being open about it helped. I feel like if you're in a group that is going to a restaurant or at a party that you feel comfortable with (like fam & friends) it is much easier if you can tell them about your health commitment and chances are, they will help keep you accountable that time. Anyway, that's just food for thought. :)

Had a late start from being up so late, so I'm heading to the gym in a bit. Love you both. <3

Mary's theory

Sorry I didn't call you back, M , I'm playing nurse to a very sick husband :( fever is 99 so it's not THAT high yet.

But I think your theory STINKS! So tell that to Joey, he's not the only one.

AND I would call you now, but it's 11:51 pm and my guess is that wouldn't be very nice of me.

oh and BLOG!

a

Another day

Hi ladies.

so today was MUCH better. It's really interesting how this whole thing really is a day to day process. I feel like there'll never be a real end to eating issues, good or bad. It's so imporatant to take each day and each meal and try, just genuinely try to make the right choice.

A woman at the gym gave me a really nice compliment and it sure did lift my spirits.

I feel like these next 10 lbs are going to be more difficult than the last. And it's a little daunting. It's hard to talk about without sounding ridiculous. Because I look at people who are around my own size and think they need to lose weight and I think they are crazy. But I know I really be much happier at this goal that I've played around with for years. I guess I feel like I'm starting all over again even though I never stopped trying to lose weight. I just think that these next ten lbs will be so hard and I'm feeling strange about it.

I do know that no matter what the scale says, I just have to keep going. My life is already so much better from this lifestyle. Feeding my body the way it deserves to be treated is its own reward. I have to come to peace with the fact that it might take a really long time to reach my goal, but even if this is the case that's not a reason to stop. Weightloss is a mindset, a constant choice. It shouldn't change based on the scale. For all intents and purposes it'd probably be better to do away completely with the stupid scale.

I feel like such an adult nowadays. Hell, I'm making Thanksgiving dinner. But really, I'm making decisions for myself, going against my families tried and true defense mechanisms and living my own way. (Insert rambling here about things completely unrelated to the blog...)

This positive lifestyle with food impacts me in a great way because I'm able to be the person I want to be. I don't feel self conscious about my body the way I did when I was eating unhealthily. Because I know just as most people can't tell I've lost weight, they couldn't either tell that I had gained weight, but I had. And I didn't feel comfortable in my clothes and I was self conscious. It's what's going on on the inside that's most important here. And when I say inside I mean mind and body. When I treat my body well I feel good about it, when I treat it bad I feel bad and so on. So even if the scale doesn't send of whistles and horns next time I step on I need to remember how I feel now after accomplishing a lot and treating my body with respect.

that's all for now.

a

Ugh..

Hey guys.

I'm really disappointed today. I weighed in and did not lose a single oz. I guess it's frustrating because I just can't pinpoint it to anything. Last week I worked out as normal, ate pretty much well. A couple of times in the hospital I had greek salads, but nothing really bad at all. I"m just so frustrated because I don't know what caused it.

So today i had cereal for breakfast, salad for lunch and about two hours after lunch I have a horrible migraine and I'm so hungry. So I had a banana and raisins. right now I'm still battling a headache and hunger and I just don't know why. It's the same salad I've had a bunch of times and somehow it's just not filling me.

So that's my blog of complaints. Sorry for the negativity, but it's just how I'm feeling.

a

You two better start blogging...

So I didn't do that well Sunday with snackies, but I talked to Joey and we're thinking it is because Sundays I get bored/restless. Him and I may start bike riding/ playing tennis on those days to help keep me on track. He's a good egg, that Joey.

I started strength training on Monday and holy cannolli it hurts to sit. I tried doing crunches on the mats but something strange happened... as soon as I crunched once, I felt this horrible pain in my back/side area, so I stopped. I think I may try the ab machine. I really like the hip abductor machines -- they work too, it's where I'm most sore.

The only thing is, I think 15 minutes may be too long because I started running out of things to do, so I may switch to 10 minutes 3 days a week. I was doing 3 sets of 8 reps, and I want to keep increasing.

Today I switched it up a little, and did 30 on the elliptical and 30 on the bike to add some variety.

Love you both very much. <3

Life is good

Hi loves,

I had surprisingly enjoyable workouts all week. Excited for two days off from cardio. I've decided to add 15 minutes of strength training three times a week to my workout, and just subtract 15 minutes from the treadmill on those days.

I'm really proud of myself for not giving up on the gym and actually growing to like(ish) it. It's becoming such a part of my routine, I have a hard time imagining not going (strange, I know).

And, this may be weird, but I like saying to the guys that head the desk "see ya tomorrow!" as I leave. I feel accomplished, lol :) Oh, and when I would see people on the elliptical machines before I would look at them and think "dear god, they're working hard and are sweating and obviously in much better shape than I." I'm now one of those people! Wootwoot.

I need to find good 15 minute strength training exercises that tone but don't add bulk. I will be hunting!

Excited for yoga tomorrow!

Love you both so so much.

MTA

Nov.12

Sometimes you'll laugh
Sometimes you'll cry
Life never tells us, the when's or why's
When you've got friends, to wish you well
You'll find your point when
You will exhale

These lyrics just spoke to me last night while I was working out. I got a really sad phone call yesterday and I looked around me wondering what to do now, how to make myself move, how to keep going. I know his life is not necessarily over, but that thought that the time might actually be here is really scary. I find myself with less hope than I had when either of them have been in the hostpital before. So I looked at my options, with the help from MTA. Lie down and suck myself into oblivion or get up off the ground and face life and keep going. I guess you know which one I chose.

I headed to the gm last night around 6pm. Going there has for so long been such an escape for me. When I get there all that matters in my little world is each tiny goal. Each set, sometimes, depending on how tired I am, each REP is its own goal. And I blare the music in my ears, so loud that I really hope the old people around me can't hear the lyrics that continually use words like hoe, bitch and ni***. ;) But last night I was just there, me my weights, the treadmill and my goals, and the music ofcourse. And it's like this alternate universe where all I can focus on is these tiny goals. Agression, saddness, excitement, fear, excitement, I've experienced all of these emotions at the gym. Whatever mood I'm in somehow always produces the same result: more motivation to accomplish those tiny and large goals. So this morning I set my alarm for 5 but it didn't go off and I ended waking up at 6:30. I headed to the gym. Really this was only 12 hours later than the workout from yesterday but I just didn't care. It was another chance to escape the pressures of the outside world and retreat into a safe place with only me, music and goals.

I don't know why I'm sharing this, it just seems to be what wants to pour out of my fingers.

Mary, upon reading your last post I think your brother is right on about a few things.
A- I don't know that you're at a plateau. You've lost and gained the 20lbs before but maybe it's just a small hump you need to get past and then you'll be fine. By the beginning of next week you may have lost more. I just think it's discouraging for you to hover around this spot, you want to drop below it quicker, which is totally understandable! My advice really is to add in that strength training. I watched the biggest loser the other night and I think I figured out why they lose SO much weight.

A girl who lost 100lbs in 9 weeks got voted off and was on Leno and she said that post biggest loser she works out 6 days a week with 6 different trainers for 4 hours on days she works and 6 hours on days she doesn't. Granted this girl started at 450 lbs and left the show at 350lbs. So she still has a long way to go. But with all this working out after the show she has only lost like 15lbs. On the show they literally must work out 8 or 9 hours a day, it's just my guess. But they do show them doings TONS of strength training and lots of cardio. Interval training really. They'll do squats, lunges, and then jump on the treadmill for 10 minutes then back to weights etc. I think because when you do strength training you're building muscle and the more muscle you have the more fat burned throughout the day.

I know that doing the cardio for extended periods of time is a lot of work, but for some reason I think that adding in the strength training really makes all the difference. I was doing 3 miles on the elliptical before we started this blog and I was at a total plateau. I was even gaining weight. But the workout I'm doing now I do strength, cardio, strength, cardio, strength, cardio. And it's not even really hard stuff, it's lunges squats, using dumbells and then get on the machines. My heart rate is up the whole time, but I'm never bored because I'm constantly moving from one thing to the other.

B- not weighing yourself. I think this is probably a really good idea. I know how much it has improved my position from cutting down from every few days to only once a week. Maybe you could go to once a month. BUT keep in close mind how your clothes are fitting, how you feel on a brisk walk, how you feel sitting vs. standing etc. Because these are all better monitors of HEALTH than of weight. If you FEEL good, you're going to look good. Focusing on that number can be encouraging when it's dropped but when it hasn't it's such a huge disappointment that it can almost hinder weightloss. I think it's a good idea as long as you're still taking notice to how you feel.

C- mindset: I think it's true. Find something you really enjoy. Even if it was swimming or something out there, add it into the routine to get you more motivated. Don't push yourself to do something you hate. If it's something you can go in and feel good and happy while doing it you're so much more likely to keep it up.


Okay I think that's all for now. I love you both, thank you so much for always being there for me.

Official Plateau

Hi ladies,

So I have determined that I am officially facing a weight loss plateau. I have researched articles on this and I think basically what I need to do is switch up my workouts. I think I'm going to do 30 on the elliptical and 30 on the bike. And then next week 30 on the elliptical and 30 on the treadmill and keep switching it up. Then on Saturdays and Sundays doing yoga and strength training.

I called Nikos, who has lost the most weight of anyone I know. I told him my dilemma: 20 pounds lost, on a plateau. He said some pretty interesting things:

a. he said I should not go to the gym for weight loss, but for fun. Obviously, he said, I would have to work at this, but it would have to be a serious attitude shift.

b. he said to stop weighing myself. Period. Ever. He said it is only discouraging when you have really far to go.

I don't think I'll not ever weigh myself, but I think maybe I should only weigh myself once a month.

So, what do you guys think???

And Ash, I love you and I am constantly keeping you and your family in my thoughts.

<3 love you both.

Tuesday, no school tomorrow :) :) :)

Hi ladies.

Well, so far this week so good. I'm on track, and am doing 30 on the elliptical and 30 on the treadmill, just a little bit slower on the elliptical so I don't have a cardiac arrest, lol.

What I'm thinking is for next week to attempt 40 on the elliptical and 20 on the treadmill and slow it down if need be. I'm thinking even if I'm slower on the elliptical it is burning more calories than the treadmill. Do we know if this is true? Anyway, if I kick it up in time, I can work on speed as I go. Eventually, I want to get to a place where I'm doing an hour on the elliptical. I'm struggling with the weights thing though, I just don't know when I should start. I just really think maybe I should just try to keep shedding the pounds before I try to tone... and I can start toning when I'm closer to my goal. I don't know though. I'll keep thinking about it.

I never did the yoga on Saturday and Sunday, so I want to make sure I do it this week.

Kate... do you know what is best to order in an indian restaurant for low cal/low fat options??

Love you guys so much, and thank you for all the support. <3

MTA

tuesday...Feta is home!

Yesterday I weighed in at 131. three lbs down from last week, only 2 lbs from my original goal weight which has now been increased so 11 lbs away from goal weight. I'm really excited about this. Last week I did a lot of cardio because I was at home, and I think that's why there was a jump of 3lbs. So I'm going to work in a little more cardio to my routine. I love doing the weights and I think my body is really looking great, but I think I just need more cardio.

Food is going really well. Stile lots of salads, fruit, smoothies, ygourt etc. I'm actually craving fruit and veggies. The cravings for crappy food has gone WAY down. Today my mom came to visit (for the first time since we've been here!) she brought Feta and then the three of us (gord, not Feta) went out to eat. I got a salad and gord had fries on his plate and I wasn't even really tempted. I had like two just because, but I didn't feel like, I need more! It was a good feeling, to know okay I want two and that's fine but that's it, and it really was it. I wouldn't order them on my plate, I'm definitely not there yet, but it's steps in the right direction I feel.

A

Disappointed

So, I've just had a crazy weekend, I don't want to go to school these next two days at all, and I just feel like crap.

Last night I cheated, bad. I went to the store and got candy, and fell right back into my old pattern. All this after my last post saying how awesome I was doing. Guess that's what I get. I feel bad and like I let myself and you guys down. I'm just really pissed off at myself.

BUT. I can take my own advice and realize how I got there, and how I can prevent it from happening again. I've been thinking about this, and next time I will

a. Call one of you. Be honest. Talk it out.
b. Re-read these blog posts for inspiration.
c. Not do it :) :)

Anyway, I just have to let it go. It's done and all I can do is keep truckin' and grow and learn from it, right?

Anyway, need to go to the gym soon. Love you guys.

M

Sunday, a new week...

I'm feeling so great this morning. I don't know why, but I just feel refreshed and happy. Maybe it's because I'm home and my hubby is back in town. Yesterday was a CRAZY stressful day. I was so frustrated. But all went well with food.

Today I'm sitting around browsing channels, and I was baffled to see there's a program on MTV called Sex Addiction with Dr. Drew. He counsels people with sex addiction, on TV which, from a client/doctor relationship, makes no sense to me as to how this is being broadcast on TV. BUT it's pretty interesting. I know this has nothing to do with "Fat does not Equal Fun" but the whole concept of addiction, no matter what it is has a lot of common threads. I'm just so glad we're all doing well with eating and saying we'll never be in a place to be addicted to food. No matter what, whether we lose pounds each week or not, at least we're being good to our bodies and not allowing addiction to ever rule our lives.

A NEW week, ladies! Are you so excited? I am!

<3 <3 <3 you!
a

so its been a while...

Oh my gosh, i love reading all the posts... it makes me so happy. I am so encouraged to read that each of us is on the same page... I for a while have had that same realization. Everytime i eat i need to think about what i am putting im my body. It is also sooooo good that we are doing it for the right reasons.I have to go but ill cathc up on everything very soon!

More Natural

So, since we started, I've been very disciplined, but eating a sugary snack each week, and just trying to be balanced and healthy. I do my best to eat healthy with 100 calorie packs, fruit, yogurt, cheese, lean cuisines, etc... and these past few days I've noticed it is all just coming a lot more naturally for me. The last time I dropped a bunch of weight, before the wedding, I would go on and off, and punish myself for a week and then not care for two days, but by doing my best to be diligent and balanced and healthy, I think about and am tempted by junk food a lot less. I mean, it doesn't go away, but I think I'm getting a handle on the lifestyle part of it. The only discouraging thing is how far I have to go... but that's okay. I'll get there when I get there. :)

I keep getting comments that my skin looks good, which I think is just a sign of my whole body "clearing up", and working through all the crap I put into it. Even with working out, I am happy to be treating my body with the respect it deserves. I know this may sound crazy, but it really is shame that we (even as a society) put our bodies down so much... I mean they work so hard and are really beautiful things that we should cherish (haha, I mean, if we didn't have them we'd be dead!). I know that sounds a little weird, but I mean it. I don't want to tear down my body. It has been good to me, and I have actually been abusing it.

That's where my head is today. <3 you guys so much.

MTA

Thoughts...

So while I work out I have all of these thoughts floating around in my head. And I know this blog is meant to help us with weight loss and fitness, but I think in order to do that, for me I need to be a little bit more introspective. So if you don't want to read this because it sounds like stuff I've already written here before I understand!

But I think that in order for my weightloss to be an actual true lifestyle change, I need to think a lot about what's going on, constantly. There's been so many times where I eat something and don't think about it first. This is one of the first things to go once someone starts a diet. Because now, instead of making a decision to eat a food, there must some thought put into it in order to maintain losing weight. So it seems that now EVERY thing that goes into my mouth I think of ahead of time. I try to think, will this help me achieve my goal or not? And I'm certainly not saying to obsess about it, I'm just saying I need to think before I reach.

That all being said, when I'm stressed in the past I've reached for food. Nowadays as we're a month into this plan, it's been a whole lot easier to know that when a craving for stress eating comes, I don't have to be a slave to it. Yesterday, for example- At Gamma's we have traditions of playing games around the kitchen table. This has been in place ever since I was very young. There's always chips and dip on the table. Because we'd sit there playing games for hours before dinner and that's just something that's always been there. So yesterday as Gamma and I are sitting there playing games, I got this craving for chips and dip. Thankfully there wasn't any in the house. But the craving was real. And this sounds weird, but I've heard that when smokers give up smoking they sometimes have to change their entire routines because sitting in the place where they usually have a cigarette or doing something where they would usually have a cigarette in hand evokes intense cravings for one. The point of this is to point out that I'm recognizing these traps and trying to put an end to them.

So, recently I listened to some people talking about the serenity prayer and how it helps them. It goes like this:

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change
The courage to change the things I can
And the wisdom to know the difference.

And I'm having a lot of issues with my mom right now, and well forever really. But I'm riding my bike today and all of these thoughts like, "why is she still with this guy, why is she not listening to my ideas, she was not the mom I needed as a child and isn't the mom I need now...." And then I think, "the serenity to accept the things I cannot change." I can't change the fact that she wasn't there for me when I needed her. I can't change the fact that she's never listened to me and she's not listening to me now. But I CAN change how I deal with it. "the courage to change the things I can-" I can start living in a healthy way, improve my life, improve my self image, improve my health, improve my body. I can change the way my future children grow up. I can be the mom to them, the way I never had growing up.

Anyway, these are my random thoughts and I know they don't seem like they're related to weightloss, but for me, thinking about these things is helping me to make better choices for the lifestyle, not just a diet like all the times I've failed before.

<3 A

Doing well...

I have to go grocery shopping so bad - the fridge is not too full right now.

I slept in late, around 12, today, so only had lunch and dinner. I think I'm going to have my sugary snack tonight (yummmmmm!)

The gym is going well,

AND I TOTALLY GOT HIT ON AT THE GYM. Funny story. Seriously. Ash, you know it. Kate, call me if you wanna know it. It is pretty funny/awkward.

So, I have a question. I eat Kashi cereal which is healthy, and I have it with skim milk. The thing is, I know I'm having more than a cup, and with the calories in the cereal and the milk... is that too much? What do you guys think?

Love you so much sisterfriends. <3

Freaking potatoes

So Breakfast today, bran cereal, coffee. Lunch went to Rodies and had an egg white greek omelette and hash browns. I didn't think hash browns were that bad, but I looked them up and they're insane! Like tons and tons of fat. Now I don't think I should have dinner. Ugh. I'm so mad. Maybe I'll just heat up some broccolli and call it a day.

A

Updates

Hi lovely ladies,

I haven't updated my meals in a while, but they have all honestly been really good! Sunday I cheated unhappily with some doritos. I've already punished myself enough though, so I'm not going to go into it. I have a hard time when i'm stressed to not reach for a naughty treat. BUT since Sunday meals have been just great. Breakfast, lunch and dinner all healthy all week. Lots of veggies and fruits as snacks. I'm getting so much better at avoiding the bad and walking away moderately full not overly disgustingly full.

Exercise has been fine. Last week I did 4 workouts of the training. This week I did one of the training and yesterday a run, today a long bike ride an tomorrow either the bike or running and hopefully saturday I'll be going to Yoga with Kate.

I'm so excited about your loss, Mar. I'm very inspired to avoid temptations thanks to your awesome resolve.

Kate, Ihope you're feeling better soon.

A

Drum Roll Please...

I lost four more pounds. :D

So the count is officially 19 lbs. lost. I am pretty much, if I remember correctly, where I was at Ash's wedding. I went wrong because I used the wedding as an excuse to slack and eat whatever I want. It all went downhill from there. I am not doing that this time, which is one reason I didn't drink at Ruschelle's party. Once I get to maintaining, I can be more flexible, but I got myself here and I have to work to undo it.

I don't want either of you to feel bad that you're not losing weight as quickly as I am, because you really have to remember, I am in a completely different place, health wise, and if you have more to lose it really does come off more quickly. You both know that though :)

Also, I need to find out what I'm going to have at Bonefish tonight... I hope they post nutritional info.

Anyway, doing well with food and the gym. Love you both soooo much. :)

MTA

NOVEMBER FIRST

YAY for a new month. We have 42 posts from October! I'm so excited. 8 lbs down from October 1st. Thanks for all help and encouragement.

Yeserday:
B: Egg white omelettes with feta, tomatoes, spinache
L: 2 100 cal packs
D: Frozen Fish, squash and asparagus
The party I had some baked lays...

Today:
B: Oatmeal
L: PB&J
D: Hasn't happened yet, but I'm thinking chicken.

Weigh in would be tomorrow, but I'm going to Titusville so it will be Tuesday. Here's hoping for atleast 2 for Tuesday!!

<3